I’m 39 and thinking about my 40’s. I’ve been excited about being 40 for a long, long time. 40 seems to be when black women bloom, when we stop taking everyone’s shit and go full on auntie and I cannot wait. I want that. Being able to say, “Look child, I am 40 damn years old”, feels like permission from the universe, God, and my ancestors to be fully, wholly ME.Read More
Excuse me but who in the hell pours from a cup? Are there no pitchers where you come from??? Do you not have gallons of milk or juice? Do you not have coffee or tea pots?
I mean, have you ever actually tried to pour from a cup?!? That shit is impossible to do without spilling everywhere.Read More
You’ve come to believe that you can never be that mom. That you aren’t good enough or strong enough, you aren’t crafty enough or loving enough, you aren’t funny enough or cool enough. You can’t cook well enough, you can’t keep the house clean enough, you can’t manage all of the schedules well enough.
YOU SIMPLY CAN’T BE ENOUGH TO EVER BE THAT MOTHER YOU DREAMED.
But you were never dreaming of the things you would do. Not really.Read More
I’ve been thinking about you turning three a lot. Worrying. Planning. When your brother turned three he was possessed by a series of demons that turned my sweet toddler into a raging, rampaging monster. We didn’t have a ton of fun that year.
And you are…well..slightly more intense than he is.
SO HOW THE HELL ARE WE GOING TO SURVIVE THIS?!?!?Read More
It isn’t about perfection. Or sacrifice. It isn’t about judgment. Or competition.
Patriarchy tells us that women can’t form supportive networks and hold them. Capitalism tells us that we must live in scarcity and competition and that abundance comes only with wealth.
We know that isn’t true.Read More
Every mother knows that what we say matters very little, but what we do makes an immediate and lasting impact. We can tell our children about consent all day every day, but when we violate their boundaries or allow them to violate ours they learn that we don’t mean what we say.Read More